you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
