I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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