i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
