next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
