Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize
