he thought i was a dude.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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