This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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