After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
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