Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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