Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Randomize
