sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
