She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
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