how can u be prego again
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
