the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize