You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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