We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Randomize
