If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
My vagina is very pro this idea
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
Randomize
