Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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