Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
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