so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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