i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Randomize
