so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
