Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Randomize
