If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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