In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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