so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Randomize
