hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
Randomize
