you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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