All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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