Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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