doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Use "feeling words"
Yay
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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