Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
