Cold hands, warm shart.
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
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