Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
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