I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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