i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
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