I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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