I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
