erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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