They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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