She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
