This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
