You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
splinters make it hard to masturbate
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
She swung at the pinata with crutches
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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