And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
My ass is underappreciated
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
