Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Randomize
