Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
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