why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize
