No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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