I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Randomize
