she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
