Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
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